WARMTH

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It's wee in the morning

yet sleep is still elusive.

I turned left and even to the right

trying to find the convenient side.

Then I felt your toes touching,
as if it has its own life.

Suddenly it's your arms
at my forehead, repeatedly rubbing
until I recognized no more.

That feeling once again prevailed
familiar as it seemed
but I love the touches anyway.

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THE NINE LIVES

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If life is like a cat that has nine lives to live by, do you think you can consume all of them in this lifetime?

Others can say nine is too many to use all of them in a single lifetime. Some may claim a couple of extra will do.

But have you ever gave it a thought as to how many times did you really get in contact with accident that almost took your life?

When I was younger, about five to seven years old I chanced upon an accident that cut my wrist including that thin and sensitive vein that can cause our life. That incident though long ago had left an imboasted mark, that to this day is still very visible.

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Second incident when I was almost hit by a taxi while crossing the street along Pedro Gil, Manila in early 80's.

Third, it involved a car that I chanced upon while driving alone a Nissan sedan on the way back home to Manila from Coastal Area in Cavite. The car I was driving went inside a 12 or 16 wheeler truck, but with God, and the angels intervention, the car while under, did not hit or collide.

Fourth, again I was driving. It was a Rocksta 4×4 jeep when after seconds I snapped and closed my eyes and when I opened, I almost hit a car which forced me to suddenly pull the jeep that caused it turned turtle around 1am in an intersection near Welcome Rotonda in Espana, Manila.

Fifth, still with a car. I was driving a mini-Pajero with my family as passengers, when somewhere in Bonifacio Drive I got entangled with trailer trucks and other vehicles bound for the north. I felt helpless and don't know what to do so I prayed and closed my eyes once more and left everything to God. Again, with faith, I and my family was spared from what could been a tragedy.

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Sixth, I was in Koror State in Palau, driving my then Nissan Bluebird one afternoon of 2007, when my cellphone fell inside the car. I reached out for my phone while driving and like in the movies, my car lost direction. Luckily, there was no other car passing the opposite lane or next to me because I could have been killed on the highway.

Seventh, we went on a fishing trip with my nine Palauan companions and five Filipinos including myself. Because the weather was good and the moon was very bright due to full moon the experienced was almost perfect.

I was scheduled to go back to the Philippines that  time, so as a treat from my Palauan and Filipino friends they arranged a fishing trip. I looked forward to that activity because that was my first time. Somehow it was successful since we started early and I caught the biggest fish in our group.

But shortly before 11pm, the weather changed hitting the 20-seater boat with heavy rains and air that forced our boat to missed its original direction. In fact, it almost drove us to Mindanao island, here in the Philippines. During the uproar of the storm everybody was asked to put our bags at the boat's locker and wear life vests.

It was around 1 or 2am after thorough prayers individually and in group the rain started to subside. The captain who turned off the engine of the boat during the surged of the storm turned the engine on and slowly traced our way back. And it was only then that we realized the captain has no compass and extra fuel that we can use for unlikely occurrence such as what happened to us.

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Eighth, about January this year, 26th to be exact. I just finished taking a bath and was picking up the bath soap when I almost slid. But before I totally fell down in the shower I prompted myself to touch the wall using my shoulder and head because I can no more move my right hand, while my knees carefully bent and my butt was feeling the touched of the toilet so I can sit down. I then tried to turned to my left side for the door opening, but new problem arise, I can't stand anymore. With a hoarse voice I tried to call my Maritess. To my self I called her thrice but she said she heard me only once.

When she was already outside the shower room, I asked her to wait as I was having a hard time. Until now it remains a mystery, I don't know how but the door eventually opened. I asked for her help to bring me to our room. She tried but she cannot even carry me up. She rather helped me put on my short and shirt before calling the husband of my cousin who fortunately is an ER Nurse, to help carry me to the room. He immediately left as I changed clothes through my Maritess. He returned and asked me to drink catapres about three times to lower down my blood pressure but my body was not responding to the medicine, so I was rushed to the hospital. 

Then the next is history. And that was the eighth life.

The ninth, when I was only days old, my parents were always in panic at home as I would choked to death literally, because as it turned out I cannot drink milk. I was lactose intolerant. I survived the crucial days and months of infanthood through the helped of my aunt who was then a midwife at the  Philippine General Hospital-Pediatrics Unit. My parents agreed that I be placed in a clinical test for a new lactose free milk called NAN. Successfully, my fragile body positively reacted to the milk.

And now I am 6 days short to 43 years, and with God's love and blessing I am still very much alive. The lesson here is, we may not be aware but it has been this long that God is protecting us. That He has always been there whether we ask Him or not. He never abandoned us no matter how selfish, self-centered or unreasonable we are,  He will always be there for us.

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PAST

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Did you see her, him?

How long was the last time? 

Is it one year, three, five or you have no more idea when was actually the last?

Did you two talk? 

How does it feel?

It's understandable that it gets confusing, but don't worry 

you are not alone in this.

The past, whether a situation or a person is something each of us can always looked at as reference.

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There are instances that when we see someone from long ago, a sudden surge of emotion strikes.

And when things like this happen, it should not be kept rather it has to be recognized.

The feeling can only be confusing if the love for the current relationship is not that strong and deep because it's really obstructive.

Remember we can always like and appreciate anyone in life all at the same time, but the HEART can never LOVE two persons at a time.

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A man's heart is too selfish that it cannot share love with someone else.

There are people who loves to keep as many relationship as they can or more than they can handle. 

This is not because people of this kind is in love, but this is more of personal issue. 

Again, the past is something you can use to guide but not to live at.

BE A TRANSFORMER

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In a Sunday mass earlier this morning the priest talked about the Parable of the Prodigal Son. That while early in life he already asked for his share of inheritance and consumed everything, he managed to realize his mistake, repented and transformed.

The priest in his homily added, "praying is the process of letting go and letting done. You do  not only TALK when praying but also LISTEN to what GOD is telling us, so that you can be transformed in order to be TRANSFORMER."

AUGUST

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It is August once again, my birth month.

Indeed this August is a month of gratitude.

It is a month filled with appreciation for the blessing of life and and chance.

I remember growing up, I don't get to enjoy this month of the year.

August is typically a heavy rain month with increased typhoons hitting the country.

 And other than the rains, typhoons and occassional floods, August is usually the periodical exam season during my elementary and high school, and midterm exams back in college.

So imagine my life then as a student, and even my early years as an adult working for then Catholic station, I still was not spared.

 Because for the Catholics, August 15 in particular is the Feast Day of the Assumption.

By the way August 15 is my natal day and which my real name was derived.

But everything now is water under the bridge for at this stage in life I get to enjoy and appreciate August more because of the gift of chance or opportunity that goes with it.

True, it is only through life's mystery and challenges that you will appreciate the gift of tomorrow which is called TODAY.

OTHER HALF

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It was all in the past

the hurdles, pains and tears 

were all worth it.

I understand a lot more other things

will come our way supposedly

to test us, and our relationship.

There are occassional fights and tears 

but despite the not so lovely spice 

I still love us romantically, intimately and playfully.

My heart is filled with gladness 

each time I see you smile and laugh

not to mention your natural fondness for music and skit.

I always tell you "you are my life, the source of my happiness, the reason for my sadness and untiring inspiration." 

I hope to be constantly a better person, to be that someone equal to your love.

We reflect what others see

because we look and are good together.

Cheers to the countless love and memories that we will continue to unfold side by side.

And to the love that continue to blossom, and to the other half who holds my heart, ILOVEYOU, always!

THE HAUGHTY

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You are too distant.
Perhaps you are happy
Nothing seems wrong.
No wonder you need no one.

How about those times when you feel like the world is conspiring against you.
When you were so devasted.
Those days when you need an ear.
When the word friend is a must.

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Of course, these days you don't need someone of lesser value.

All you want is to pamper your ego.
While many have been said,
It is easier to ignore than to retract.

Yes, ignore today because it looks unsignificant.

No social value in a world ruled by an arrogant hobbit.

He, who thinks that he is as tall as a giraffe, and as clever as the amphibians.

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Go head, it is your right anyway.
But don't bother to remember
Because you have long cut the ties
to what is called "FRIENDS."