ADIEU

Sunset of June 11, 2022, at La Paz, San Narciso, Zambales

In life, oftentimes you are put in a situation where you have to let go in order to achieve one. And whatever the unknown package that comes along with that specific decision you must accept and embrace.

Crossroads. Like most ordinary people, I too, am often at the crossroads wondering where to go, especially if you have no one to turn around. Most of the time I would confine myself at the comfort of my deep thoughts and imaginations that no one could see or intervene unless I share it with others, and there are moments that I would talk and seek specific guidance from God.

When I had a mild stroke and eventually recovered in 2016, I have been telling myself and to everyone close to me  that I am not yet ready to go, all because of that one great love. Yes, that time I still wanted to hold on and live longer for my great love. 

However, this morning I had a dream, we were looking at a new place, hopefully to acquire a place for us to be called "ours." As we toured the place there was this guy who was very sneaky, obviously interested in my partner. He moved carefully so that I could not go near my partner and strategized that I would end up on the opposing side. Realizing that I'm becoming a burden I silently made my way out. When I woke up today, I told my partner everything, and asked her if she will give up on me or should I prepare myself, she responded to me with "maybe not?". 

Again, this morning another incident happened that made me realize that perhaps I have to prepare myself, that soon I must accept and start letting go. Maybe, just maybe, this is the reason why for the longest time nothing seems to be going right because soon I will have to go and be reunited with Tatay, Eddieboy and my sister Mary. That while I wanted to be still with Maritess, I am already a burden, so I guess it is time to accept that my purpose is already done and I am no longer needed here.